stay/ May 2019

I beat myself up

I tear myself in two

There's a pressure in my chest

Tears I can't stop

For wanting you

There are days I deny 

Days I wallow 

Days I hope

Sometimes I don't try

It hurts to breathe 

The words written on my heart

 pride I swallow 

Touches not fulfilled 

I burn 

I yearn 

For words to flow

I cry

I say goodbye 

I want you

Stay

I'm in love with you

Missing you/ june 2019

Missing you has become my companion 

Who holds me at night

Wrapping your dark fingers 

Around my heart 

Missing you has become the place I daydream

Giving me illusions of what might have been

Missing you has been like a hole in my soul

Where the cold wind whips through

chilling me to the core

Missing you has become a part of my existence 

Like breathing 

While razorblades slice my lungs

Missing you has been my companion 

For it's all I have left of you